Varanasi - Day 2 of 3

Day 2 – After a sumptuous breakfast at Ramada Hotel around 8am, we left for Allahabad. The 3 hour drive was a lot of fun, filled with laughter, music and antaakshari and we soon reached Allahabad. We were so excited to have a dip in the Triveni Sangam. The sacred Sangam is the confluence of three of the holiest rivers – Ganga, Yamuna and Saraswati.  The boatman rowed us towards the area where the 3 rivers meet.

 

The Triveni sangam is the point at which the brown Ganges meets the greenish Yamuna and Saraswati who comes from below.  As we stood there in the midst of the Sangam, it seemed like the daughters of Saraswathy rising at the confluence of the 2 great rivers Ganga and Yamuna. The feeling was so primal and yet over powering. With a sense of fulfillment, we returned back to Varanasi around 4pm.

 

 

We then walked around the narrow streets and saw small houses with looms spinning beautiful patterns of Benarasi silk saris and bought a couple of saris. We then went back for a second evening of Ganga aarthi listening to soulful rendering of bhajans and watching the reflection of  lights from the aarthi dancing on the still waters of the Ganges. It was almost like seeing it all for the very first time. 

We then went again to Kasi Vishwanatha temple and the highlight of the evening was when we dedicated ourselves to singing Shiva bhajans while being totally mesmerized with the clang of the bells, chanting of prayers and total devotion emanating from all around us. A whole hall full of people joined us in our bhajans and the hour passed like a minute where time stood still. We felt blessed to get this opportunity which took us to a different plane of  religious euphoria. We were asked to come the next day for aarthi and Sama Veda chanting at the temple as well.

Although we didn’t want to miss out on the hot milk in mutka and aloo tikki chaat on the roadside, we got a quick bite and returned back to Ramada for a full fledged dinner and turned in for the night.

Varanasi - Day 1 of 3

A rose is a rose is a rose and the rose by any other name would still smell as sweet.  Varanasi, Benaras, Kasi – whatever you call this sacred city, is engulfed with divinity and the feeling as soon as you land there is celestial. The 7 of us have been looking forward to this trip for a long time and the time had come for us to set off on this religious sojourn.

 

Day 1 - We landed in Varanasi at 10am and were greeted by Nihar, our guide at the airport. We got on the 11 passenger van reserved for us for the next 3 days and set off on our journey. We started off by driving up to Sarnath, giving a Buddhist perspective to the holiness of the area. We saw the Moolagandha Mandir, the Dhameka Stupa where Buddha delivered his first sermon after he attained enlightenment, archeological sites, big Buddha sculptures in various temples and museum with a sculpture of the Ashoka pillar that was chiseled out of a single block of sandstone.

 

We drove back to Varanasi and before checking in to Ramada around 4 pm, had lunch at Royal family restaurant. The evening was a melting pot of all things spiritual, mysticism, and divinity as we gravitated towards the Jyotirlinga of Shiva enshrined in the Kashi Vishwanatha temple. We used different modes of transportation to get there. First by van from Hotel Ramada and half way through the heavily crowded streets in a cycle rickshaw which brought back childhood memories of going to school in a rickshaw and finally walked through the narrow winding streets. As we walked through the streets, I was sure we were going to get lost and silently followed our guide trusting his instincts. Finally we reached the Kashi Vishwanatha temple and the feeling of exhilaration reached the peaks of devotion and the glimpse of the Jyotirlinga amidst the mass of individuals funneled into an oneness with God. From there, we went to Kasi Visalakshi and Annaporneswari temples.

What we witnessed next was one of the most memorable moments of life – the vibrant and admirably choreographed Ganga Aarthi ceremony. It was energizing to see thousands of people assembled at Dashashwamedh Ghat to view the spectacle of evening aarthi in Varanasi. Seven young priests in traditional Indian attire moving to the tune of melodious aarthi and bhajan, holding huge deepams was a sight to behold. The soul stirring bhajans reverberated through the area and the whole atmosphere was magical with the aarthi deepam creating a bright hue against the darkened sky. As the aarthi came to an end and the young man singing the bhajans with such fervor started to unwind, we had the opportunity to continue the momentum by singing Bho Shambo in unison. Deriving such a feeling of satisfaction, we then scrambled to float lamps in leaf boats in the Ganges. It was amusing to see other people around taking pictures of us as we tried to take selfies.

As we were returning back to the hotel, we didn’t want to miss out on any local specialties and had aloo tikki chat for dinner and finished off with hot milk with cream floating on top in matkas or clay pots which added to the subtle flavor.

Appa - Our homage to you on your first anniversary

Appa – Our homage to you on your first anniversary

Amidst a lot of mixed feelings and emotions, the first year anniversary  ceremonies of my father passing away was done with due respects on Nov, 24, 25 and the natural flow of the events was as smooth and coordinated as only can be done in Vijaya's house at Koustuba. Everything seems so natural and everyone is so involved during an event in Koustuba. Sriram athimbere may not have been the son in name, yet he took the special place and with pride did all the rituals my parents duly deserved. And on Nov 26^th, the younger ones Uma and Ramesh completed the rituals with the Shubam ceremonies .

Since the morning, I was filled with thoughts of my father. It was his first death anniversary according to Hindu Calendar.  And as per the Hindu customs, on this November 24th “Shraadh” was performed. I had actually no intentions of blogging about this incident, which is extremely personal to me and I am extremely sensitive about the whole event. With the pindam offered, Appa and Amma have joined with their ancestors and continue to bless us, the mere mortals we are and indulging our needs.

Truth be told, I can't remember the specific details and sequence of events that took place that day. I just know I spent the entire day thinking, Exactly one year ago on Dec 7th, Appa was alive and fine and  our lives were just humming along. And suddenly I felt like an orphan very small, completely helpless when Kartik kept us posted about Appa's condition in ICU and Appa's final moments in Koustuba with Vijaya, Pushpa and Lata beside him.

This could be my time travel where I was quickly turning pages back to that moment when I wanted to pause. Amma left us in December of 2010 and Appa in December of 2015. I sometimes fantasize about time travelling back to "save" them or just stay with them again.

I'd like to tell you it gets better, and in a lot of ways it does, but there's a pain that will be with us forever. It's supposed to be with you forever, I think. The grief bursts continue to emerge, tears wanting to roll down my eyes, but just refuses to flow.  

The way most of my family has dealt with the loss of  Appa, is that every time we miss him, we share a memory of him or sing his favourite song, Broohi Mukindethi. And our commitment to him is to stay strong, support each other and pass on the values that we have been instilled with. We, the 7 sisters, Vijaya, Pushpa, Lata, Kala, Savithri, Usha, Uma stand together paying homage to the most wonderful person we proudly call Appa.

 

 

Weight Fight - Day 1

This is a big step for me but I'm really excited too. I’m going to keep you in the loop till I lose 15 lbs!!!
It helps that my head is in the right place; it's no good changing my eating habits if my head is telling me something different. This is all about me, for me and by me! I have had no pressure from my lovely, adorable family. My daughter who is a size 2 does think I need to lose weight but is very diplomatic but I know what she's thinking!

I woke up this morning and decided to put on a pair of Size 10 jeans which had always been 'snug' only to find I could hardly zip them up and that's what did it. I weigh 150lbs. I resolved that Monday, July 29 would be the day losing some weight would become a priority.

I looked up various sites from Weight Watchers to Jenny Craig but felt uninspired and also knew that I would find it difficult to be motivated to stay on track; moreover, I actually do understand my weight behaves like a pendulum...I eat more calories than I expend and do very little exercise;  so to sit and go through various weight loss routines once a week seemed a shocking waste of time & money.

I decided to keep track of my food intake and exercise routine, and what better day to start than Monday, the first day of the week and the day I usually fast seemed perfect.
Fruit consumption today was - apple, pear and blueberries. and stir fried vegetables in one tsp olive oil with onion, ginger, spinach and brocolli and handful of peanuts. 
Exercise routine was a 45 minute brisk walk and 15 minute jog.

Lets see what tomorrow holds for me:)

New Beginnings

Last year this time, I was coaxing and cajoling and sometimes even screaming at my daughter Shveta that it was the right time for her to meet someone to spend her life with. To buy time, she said, "Ok, but let me finish my CMA". That was all I was waiting for. She finished her CMA last October, and I started telling my family and friends to let me know if they knew anyone suitable for my daughter. LOL, imagine her wrath when she knew I was trying to set her up. Although we change with the times, there are still some things ingrained in us that we feel obligated to pursue. I thought the right thing for me to do was what my parents did for me.

My son Sharad had to constantly remind me that I should be looking for someone suitable to be Shveta's partner first before identifying if he'd be my ideal son in law. His take was that I was more enamoured with someone who loves Indian music and can sing well while Shveta wanted someone who works out and goes camping. Oh God, what a world of difference. And to top that, Shveta said, I don't want doctors or anyone from Wall street with lots of money, 16 hours workdays, and no work/life balance. She had her own list of wants and no no's.
Within 3 months, my frustration was mounting and I was getting exasperated with her demands. 

In mid January, Shveta very coyly mentioned that she thinks she met someone who she really likes.  My joy knew no bounds. I wanted all the details right away. I saw the glow in her face when she talked to me in length about Pavan and I certainly liked what I heard. They talked for hours everyday and just seeing her constant smile was so precious to me. He made a special trip for Valentine's to see her for the first time and the most significant moment was when Pavan came home for the first time on our Wedding Anniversary in March. What a special treat that was for me and Mohan, seeing the kids so crazy in love with each other.

Shveta, you are more special than before, through every stage, through every age, I love you even more.

To Appa - On Father's Day

I called Appa yesterday just to tell him what an amazing person he was. He gave me a shy laugh and I coaxed him to ask me the reason for telling him this. I recounted all the things he had achieved and told him how amazed I was by all the things he had done for us. I asked him how he was able to do this and very modestly he replied "By God's grace". I realised at that time how lucky I was to be his child and decided it was an apt time to show my appreciation of him on Father's day. Here is to my dad.

Appa, As I was growing up, you always made my world feel so safe, the deep voice of yours steadied me and the strong support shielded me. I never felt vulnerable or afraid, because to me, you seemed most strong and stable.

As I grew older, it dawned on me that the world I faced everyday was a lot bigger and scarier than the one you had created for me, and, I wondered sometimes if you felt like relying on someone else's strength for a change.

Now I am an adult and living on the outside of your safety net, and finally understanding what sacrifices you had to make, for you to make sure my world felt alright all the time.

Growing up in the sanctuary of your love is something I'll always cherish and the moments I'll never forget.

You are the tower of strength and with Amma by your side, you showed us guidance and instilled such invaluable values to your seven daughters.

We appreciate you for all of this and love you.

Bollywood Movies

Being a first generation immigrant from India, Bollywood films have always been a part of my life. Growing up, it was romantic to watch Rajesh Khanna movies, thrilling to watch Dharmendra, fun to watch a Shammi  Kapoor movie, emotional to watch Sanjeev Kumar and always fascinating to watch Amitabh Bachan movies.

Bollywood, India's vast movie-making centre, produces more than 300 movies annually. The 2000s saw a deviation from traditional classical movies to more contemporary themes.  Hrithik Roshan, John Abraham, Shah Rukh Khan, Abhishek Bachan with their macho looks along with Aishwarya Rai, Kareena Kapoor, Vidya Balan, Priyanka Chopra with their sexy looks have set light to the flames of Bollywood and sent many a heart racing. Bollywood’s popularity has now reached new heights around the world leading to wider box office successes in India and abroad.

 What does one expect from a Bollywood movie? The movies all have similar themes. Boy meets girl and falls in love, then follows the family denial, add a villain who makes their lives difficult, throw in a few fighting scenes and inject it with a song every half hour and finally the happy ending with the family acceptance. The end result is a Masala movie comprising of high drama, music, dance, tragedy, comedy, action, plots and side stories which makes up the full 3 hours. Most movies are shot in exotic locales, and Canada, known for its scenic beauty, is becoming a very popular destination.

Bollywood movies are a great choice in entertainment.  If you are in the mood for high drama,  whether it be an epic romance, a swashbuckling adventure, a revenge saga, a comedic extravaganza, or a reaffirmation of family love, then there's no other cinema for you, but Bollywood movies.